My gripe this week is with the College Football Selection Committee. If you follow my twitter, last week I posted my Top 5 of Clemson, LSU, TCU, Baylor & Ohio State. This week a bunch of 60 year olds decided who should be in the Top 4. There will never be a perfect system but this one is frustrating. What business does Condi Rice have deciding college football playoffs? Ty Willingham was an awful coach that bounced around and we are supposed to trust his judgment? Kirby Hocutt was in Marketing, licensing, and is now working as an AD. Marketing and licensing jobs...interesting. No matter who was in those seats people would complain but there has to be better options than a Secretary of State, a failed coach, and few athletic directors. It should be Phil Steele, Uncle Radar, Greg from the New Britain Inn, and Artie Lange. Give the people what they want!
On to the teams....I hate the SEC and this is why. I understand there are some very good teams there (Florida), but the playing field isn't level. Alabama's home loss to a very average Ole Miss team, basically didn't count. A few weeks ago I called for Memphis to possibly upset Ole Miss, and they did. The reason Bama jumped TCU and Baylor is supposedly because of Strength of Schedule. TCU has basically manhandled the Big 12 and is being punished for it. Bama has beat overrated teams like Tennessee, A&M, and Arkansas. The Ole Miss game essentially never happened. Meanwhile Florida loses on the road the number 2 team in the rankings and they are somehow below Bama.
Notre Dame at # 5 has really had a grind. Beating UMass, Navy, a down USC team, and an overachieving Temple squad. Yes they hung in with Clemson, but how is their schedule any stronger than the Big 12 slate? Any other team that played that schedule, with those same results, would be sitting at number #22.
We all know its a business. College Football is a cash grab like that of a strip club, and the playoff is their donkey show. Alabama & ND don't get punished for losing games the way any other team would. Those 2 teams are going to draw alot more people to games than Iowa or Memphis.I'm not saying Memphis should be Top 4, they shouldn't. But the transitive property would suggest that since Bama lost to Ole Miss, and Memphis beat Ole Miss. Maybe 10 spots shouldn't separate those teams in the first rankings.
Just a warning...this weekend is my make or break weekend for the year. I either buy myself a Tag Heuer Monaco (blue face, the black face one is mickey mouse shit) or I retire from gambling....for about 24 hours. My Twitter may be on fire this weekend, so keep an eye on it. Touchy is home alone this Saturday without 2 Hand Touch (my 9 month old son) so I plan on stopping by my local beer store. Sellersville Beverage & Cigar (301 S. Main Street Sellersville PA 18960). Picking up a case of Mad Elf for the holidays...won't crack those until bowl season. But I will also be grabbing a case of Yuengling cans for $17.99 to wash down Saturdays winners along with a victory cigar. I suggest you all do the same. If you're riding with this weeks picks you are going to need a drink handy.
Texas Tech/WVU THREE WAY. OVER 79. WVU O43.5. Tech O35.5. WVU dropped about 21 points vs TCU last week. Coming home against a fugazi defense like our dear friend Kliff's is just what these hillbillies need. If you watched last week you may have noticed something, aside from Kliff's guys all wearing shades, the defense can't stop anything. We are in store for a good old fashioned shootout in the Big 12. This total will keep going up so catch it early.
WKU 1H -13.5 REVERSED with LA TECH -14.5 1H. Put up or shut up time. Uncle Radar made a collect call to me on Saturday morning from the jungle to remind me just how profitable the weeks that we hit reverses are. It wasn't just the drugs talking, hes right. Changes your whole weekend if you pop one. WKU & Tech are basically playing the same game. Both are home, against inferior conference opponents. FAU has a little better defense than the Mean Green of North Texas but don't let that sway you. Our teams can score and love to play it up to the home crowd.
TCU/OK State THREE WAY. OVER 77. TCU O41.5 OKState O35. I'm going for blood now. TCU has shaved me 2 weeks in a row...because they got conservative with a lead. Not this week. My friend James and I were discussing last week TCU is flawed, especially on defense. Playing at Oklahoma State this game is ripe for high flying offense. TCU can't sit back in this one, its time to go punch for punch with a quality opponent. 2 3 ways in one weekend? Not since college (never happened)
Green Bay Team Total OVER 24.5 - awful showing by the Pack last Sunday. That won't happen again. The Panthers eeked out a MNF win earlier in the week, and really did nothing to impress. Rodgers and company should be able to bounce back here, and benefit from a couple of ill timed Cam passes. It's back to reality for Cam and the Panthers.
DATELINE: RAI LEH, THAILAND
As a young hot shot line cook stationed in Saigon during the Vietnam war I was noticed by a Bird Colonel with a surprisingly advanced palette. He had a mission and wanted me to be part of it. When your a 19 year old grunt you follow orders, and I did, when it was over I would never be the same.
I was commissioned to a remote jungle in the Thai Highlands, an R&R/HQ for Military and Defense Dept. brass. ( McNamara had a shrimp allergy) I fell in love as soon as I arrived, it was a bit more exotic than a South Philly row house. I worked all day among the local mae khura learning to cook foods I never knew existed, and working their daughters all night.18 months later I realized I didn't want to leave. I was eight days and a wake up when I tried to get the Colonel to extend my duty. He cited my recent behavior and reassigned me state side, where I was discharged .After banging around kitchens for awhile, I had enough and headed back to Thailand. I opened a little bar/restaurant in Chiang Mia near the Ping river about 700 clicks south of Bangkok. I had a good thing going. Problem was I acquired an affinity for opiates and went down a very,very dark path. After a few years, a few chef buddies came and brought me back to Philly. As a chef I come back to Southeast Asia every two years or so to keep up with the food, and to think about what might have been. As I lay in my hammock between two palm trees on this exotic beach: I'm taking Clemson/Florida St. OVER.
DATELINE: PHUKET, THAILAND
It's about 4:30 AM, been drinking Sura all day and night, slipping in and out of a He Ron Xin and Fin haze. The satellite TV flickers in my hotel room, it's the only light for miles, a normal Football Sunday for me here in Phuket. I'm seeing things but the drugs and alcohol tell me it's not real. A video game someone put in my TV. The Giants and Saints are going up and down on each other like the two girls who just left my room. When the dust settles it's 49-49 with 20 seconds left, and Red Nose has a decision to make. He makes it,it's bad, real bad. As Jack Nickolson's psychotic maniacal Irish mobster Frank Costello says in The Departed,"They just do not stop having the Mafia in Providence". Red Nose just does not stop punting the ball to fast guys with seconds left in the game. At the time of the punt I was about 12 hours into an 18 hour binge and thought I was hallucinating back to the DeSean game(my favorite Eagles game of all time and I was at the Dallas game), but it was live in the Superdome. What better city than New Orleans, known for fantasy and the supernatural, for Red Nose to make the same mistake he made on Dec.19, 2010. He punted the ball to a fast guy when he should have punted it out of bounds. and the Giants lost on the last play of the game. As the 50 yarder sailed through the uprights I sprung up from my haze, drenched in sweat, and wondered out loud "how the fuck did this guy win 2 Super Bowls."
SEE YOU ON THE OTHER SIDE
My nephew Touchy's recent hot streak in college football (13-3, he also had the BGSU game wired on Wed. first and second half reverses that's 4 more winners)has afforded me the funds to extend my stay in Southeast Asia. I'll be maintaining my home base in Phuket (although I'm making the natives a little jumpy) I may cross the Gulf of Thailand and venture into Vietnam, as I have a taste for a strong bowl of Pho. I'm technically not allowed back in Nam, but after almost 50 years I'm hoping the government doesn't hold a grudge. If they however choose to dredge up the past, please contact Touchy with the contact info for a primo immigration lawyer. If Touchy doesn't cool off I won't be back until the playoffs.
Follow Touchy on Twitter @TommyTouchy
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